How Good Will My iPod look Here?

We officially have a hotel!  And I spoke Spanish to the people there on the phone, so we have already totally endeared ourselves to the staff.  I made sure to intersperse my slamming, vocabulary-packed, grammatically-flawless sentences with lots of umms so that they would know that I am humble about my amazing facility with languages.  And I refrained from inserting a casual, friendly pendejo or cabron anywhere into the conversation, because without seeing me they have no way of knowing that I have the street cred to pull such a thing off.  Which I totally, totally, do, putas.

(I've been practicing my Spanish a lot in my head.  Anything anyone wants to discuss--as long as its related to crude anatomical terms, the availability of silverware, clean glasses, ice, and hamburgers, or the availability of my sister for "marriage"-- will be no problem whatsoever for me.)

Mas cubiertos, anyone?  Vassos?  Ay, pinche cabron!.  Por favor, no habla de mi mama.  Ella no esta tu suegra.

Here is a picture of the bungalow where I will drunkenly bid adios to my twenties:

And here is the only other picture that doesn't have the name of the hotel on it.  It's the 'softly lit original sauna-style bathroom that allows (me) to enjoy a shower while admiring the natural surroundings' :

Sadly, there is no photo of the 'private deck and hammock out front, (which) invites (Cara) to relax and enjoy the colorful tropical gardens of the surroundings covered with bromeliads, heliconias, gingers, palms and tropical fruit trees, which interact with a great variety of birds and butterflies, as well as to listen to the different sounds of the jungle or just lie under a bright moonlight and sparkling stars'. 

I'll bring one back.

Comments

looks wonderful!