Reality Check

Um, hi, I don't have a job.  Tomorrow I start training my boss' wife to do the job I now have, the one I hate, the one that pays my bills and underwrites my sushi addiction.  I've kind of avoided thinking about the joblessness because of the election, but I woke up thinking about it yesterday and quickly returned to bed with a migraine.  I'm a leetle bit stressed.

Despite the fact that I have had at least one job every day of my life since I was 13, I'm finding it extremely hard to look for a new thing right now.  There isn't anything I particularly want to do, except read blogs and play Scrabble and cook.  I think I'd like to cobble some stuff together for a while; wait tables and copy-edit and dog-sit for my yuppie neighbors and attend school.  Two problems with that: One, I don't do well without some structure; I need  routine in order to accomplish anything.  And I'm in a bad place to be living without a steady income.  Two, I don't think the school thing is going to happen in January.  Recent events in the homeland make me think that no money from my mom is forthcoming, and that I shouldn't take it even if it's offered.   I haven't heard anything form the school I applied to.  Plus, you know, I don't have a job any more. 

So, crafting a flexible schedule just for the sake of having one seems too risky.  Not having enough money when you work full-time is kind of noble.  Not having enough money when you waitress and copy-edit and walk dogs of your own volition is just annoying.  Let's break it down like this:

Benefits of not having one full-time job:

• Not sitting on ass all day
• Not stuck with (inevitable) crappy co-workers 40 hours per week
• Grocery store all to myself
• Work at home; procrastinate by cleaning floors!
• Had better sex life as a waitress than as an office drone
• Freedom, freedom, sweet blessed freedom
• Can make own, dream schedule
• Copy-editing could take off, eventually lead to writing, writing could lead to more writing, and boom; I'm telecommuting from the Caribbean.
• No more suits, on me or anyone I talk to

Arguments against free-wheeling lifestyle:

• Am lazy SOB who enjoys sitting on ass all day
• Some former co-workers now friends, so not all co-workers suck
• No health insurance
• Not having a full-time job slap in the face to Midwestern work ethic; very blue state, and I still want Christmas presents from my family
• Dearth of marriageable men to be met while working at home in pajamas.
• Freedom: just another word for nothin' left to lose?  Or just some people talkin'?
• Haven't heard of many copy-editors who went on to win the National Book Award, but I have heard of lots of waitresses who died early and wrinkly while suffering from sciatica
• Seriously, can I wait tables again?  By choice?  Restaurant managers horrible people, in general
• Still need some sort of career path.  Is footloose life moving toward that or away?  I need a goal.

That exercise wasn't really helpful.  I need a life coach or something.  While I figure this out, I need to continue the search for gainful employment  I finally found a job (no specified salary) that I can see myself doing, and I'm totally paralyzed at the thought of writing a cover letter.  Plus I have a million hours of clean-up and organization I need to do in this office today.  This whole thing just blows.

Comments

Gosh, Clarita.

Can we read blogs and play Scrabble and cook together?

[Cara]

I'm sure we could, if I knew who this was...